ghosts on CBS follows Samantha (Rose McIver) and Jay (Utkarsh Ambudkar) as a young, married couple who come across an old house after a distant relative of Samantha’s passport. Given the state of their lives in New York, the two decide to uproot their lives and take the risk of restoring the house and converting it into a bed and breakfast. Little do they know that there are several spirits residing on the property who are always watching and using their specific talents to bring some joy to their eternity on earth. When Samantha falls down the stairs and falls into a coma, she awakens with the ability to see the other occupants of the house, and a new kind of family begins to develop.
As the series begins to wrap up Season 1 when it returns on March 31st, we know enough about the house’s ghostly residents (the ones upstairs, at least) to rank them by who we want to haunt us. But let’s start with the person we least want in our home…
8. Captain Isaac Higgintoot
Last but not least, no pun intended, is Isaac (Brandon Scott Jones), the captain who died two weeks after the siege of Fort Ticonderoga. There are numerous decisions behind this, but the most important is the fact that walking through him would be the one worst. After dying of dysentery, walking through Isaac brings with it an odor that makes the living want to throw up. (Even the ghosts are disgusted when it happens.) However, Isaac is just kind of a buzzkill, too. He’s stuck in the past, haunting himself with the fact that he’s a footnote in history, and hasn’t had the same impact as some of the lesser men he’s known in his lifetime. It wouldn’t make for a funny or spooky haunted experience. hard pass.
Next would be Hetty (Rebekah Wisocky), Samantha’s distant relative who originally owned the Woodstone estate and was the lady of the house before her death. Hetty is just a little bland as a ghost. There’s nothing really bad about her, other than the casual misogyny that’s ingrained in her for the years she’s been living that ghosts used for comedy when Hetty chides Samantha for her modern style. You just miss it. If you want a ghost who scolds you like an angry mother, Hetty is your choice. Other than that, the character doesn’t have a lot of substance yet, and nothing about her makes her special compared to the other ghosts in the house. hard pass.
6. Peter Martino
Peter (Richie Moriarty) is an all round good guy but like Hetty it wouldn’t be a fun ghost to have around. If he were the ghost haunting my house and I had no idea he was around, Pete would probably be the first choice because he’s harmless in virtually every way. But not in the context of the show. Pete isn’t last because there’s no real downside to having Pete around, but he’s not higher on this list because there’s no real benefit to having Pete around either.
to have Trevor (Asher Grodman) around seems like it’s going to be a hoot… and that’s why it’s not higher on this list. He’s fun, full of excitement, and he’s the youngest to pass so he’s the most up to date on what’s going on in the world. However, Trevor’s superpower is also the reason why he doesn’t make it higher on this list. As we’ve seen, when Trevor created a dating profile and started texting Jay’s sister, or when he accidentally dropped Samantha down the stairs, he can cause real trouble. And with Trevor’s personality, he never is not will cause trouble.
4. Alberta Haynes
Alberta (Daniela Pinock) is such a charismatic, energetic woman. Her theory about the assassination, which seemingly turns out to be true, only goes to show that Alberta is a lot more intuitive and intelligent than everyone thought, and that makes her life seem all the more intriguing. As someone who lived and died in the 1920s, Alberta’s view of the world is full of glitz and glamor as vibrant as it is. There’s absolutely no doubt that she would be the best ghost at times, but her swagger about the people she’s met in her life and her creepy ability to hum to the living in the house are the reason why she doesn’t is ranked higher.
Thorfinn (Devan Chandler Long) would be a joy, especially as a child. The fact that he befriends Hetty as a child and sings her to sleep shows how kind and pure Thorfinn is beneath his macho exterior. He’s seen a lot of life on this one piece of land in his eternity and obviously has a lot to offer in terms of his perspective on the world. Plus, his love of bad TV shows makes him even more loveable. But his ability to mess around with electricity is why he’s not higher on this list. It can make lights flicker, but it also has the potential to start fires, as Samantha and Jay learned the hard way when it destroyed their gazebo. His adorable and unnecessarily aggressive personality isn’t worth the fire risk.
Sasappis (Roman Zaragoza), like Thorfinn, would be a pleasure to have around. Except unlike the former, Sas isn’t driven by anger and aggression. He’s a very easygoing, gentle man who enjoys trashy TV shows and gets upset if you watch episodes without him. He’s a storyteller, which means he’s entertaining and has things to share with the world (or those in your household). There’s really no downside to having Sas around, and he could easily be the top ghost on this list (and probably is for many who’ve pondered the subject themselves). However, there is one ghost that seems a little more entertaining…
1. Flower (aka Susan Montero)
Honestly, with flower (Sheila Carrasco) around just seems like a lot of fun. Walking through her would lead to some interesting times given her “super strength”, transporting you to La La Land for half an hour before being forced to see the world as it is again. She’s kind, loving, and easily distracted by pretty things like butterflies, so it’s not like she’s really causing any mischief or requiring a lot of attention. But as we have seen, there is another side to Flower. She joined a cult, lived on a commune and robbed a bank before dying trying to hug a bear. She’s a hot mess, honestly, but it would be exciting to try to understand how Flower came to be the person she was when she died.
ghosts Returns on CBS March 31st.
Rose McIver on Ghosts, how iZombie helped her prepare for the series and her desire to play a villain
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